A survivor told me my tone made victims sound weak and I had to rethink everything

I was writing up a breakdown of that NXIVM documentary for a blog and a woman who escaped messaged me saying I made the victims sound like helpless victims instead of fighters. She pointed out I kept using words like "brainwashed" and "broken" which stripped them of their agency. Has anyone else gotten feedback that totally reframed how you talk about cult survivors?

3 comments

3 Comments

brooke_jones3d ago

Oh wow, that's intense. I mean, the whole "brainwashed" thing, yeah that one hit me when someone called me out on it too. It's crazy how just one word choice can totally flip the narrative from "they survived something horrible" to "they were passive victims who had no say." I remember reading about how in the NXIVM case, the women actually recruited other members themselves. That doesn't mean what happened to them was okay, but it does show they were making choices even in a messed up system.

patricia322d ago

That "they were making choices" part really hit me.

abby_morgan182d ago

Right, the whole choice thing is such a mind trip, I had that same moment with a therapist once.