Why does nobody talk about how much easier co-parenting gets after year two

I remember reading posts here when my ex and I first split, everyone saying it gets better, and I honestly didn't believe them. But last month we hit the two year mark since our divorce was finalized, and that weekend we actually managed to swap the kids at a park in Arlington without a single argument or passive aggressive text. What changed? We both stopped trying to prove who was the better parent and just focused on keeping a steady schedule. Has anyone else noticed a big shift around the two year point?

3 comments

3 Comments

alicer539d ago

@emma_garcia nailed it, the scorekeeping stops and everything just flows.

emma_garcia9d ago

That two year mark is real. It took us about that long to stop trying to win some invisible competition and just get the kids where they need to be without it turning into a thing. The schedule became automatic, and we both finally accepted that this is just how life is now. It's less about being right and more about not making the kids deal with our leftover anger. Park swaps with no drama are a win, seriously. Good for you guys for getting there.

dylan_sanchez9d ago

A buddy of mine went through the same thing around year two. @emma_garcia hit it about the invisible competition thing. My friend used to text his ex like fifteen times a day about what the kids ate or what time they went to bed. Then one day he just stopped. He told me he realized he was driving himself crazy for no reason. Now they swap the kids at a gas station near 35 and they don't even get out of their cars. Just a wave and they're gone. Wild how different it is once you both give up on the scorekeeping.