Talked to a social worker about dementia and it totally flipped my view on nursing homes

I was dead set on keeping my mom at home forever, but last week I had a 45-minute chat with a geriatric social worker at the senior center in Beaverton. She told me that dementia patients actually do better in specialized memory care units where they have structured routines and trained staff 24/7. She showed me how my mom's sundowning was getting worse because I couldn't provide that consistency while working my own job. I still feel guilty about it, but she convinced me that a good facility with a 6-to-1 patient to staff ratio might actually give my mom a better quality of life. Has anyone else had to make this switch after thinking you'd handle everything yourself?

3 comments

3 Comments

simon_carr5h ago

Yeah @baker.christopher hit it - those high turnover places are brutal, but a stable 6-to-1 ratio is worlds apart from that. My aunt got placed in a unit with like 12 patients per staff and it was a disaster. The social worker's point about sundowning is real too, I've seen firsthand how the structure helps way more than guilt-ridden family trying to do it all solo.

charlies379h ago

Heard pretty much the same thing from my buddy Mark when he moved his dad into memory care. He was wrecked with guilt for months but then his dad actually started sleeping through the night and stopped getting so agitated.

baker.christopher9h ago

Read a study once that said dementia patients in facilities with high turnover did worse than ones in stable homes. But the social worker in your story sounds like she knew her stuff. Sometimes the numbers just make more sense.