Entities of the Furry Fandom Pt IV

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Porn and Insanity:
Entities of the Furry Fandom Part IV
by weird_guy_in_the_corner

Hey there everybody; it’s your favorite hater Weird_guy. This’ll be the last article in the "Entities of the Furry Fandom" series because there’s little more to say about the countless fucknuts that inhabit the monster that is furry. I’ll be picking apart places as well as people, so this should be fun. Oh, and I believe I forgot to take my medication this morning so if I seem strange at times then shut up and keep it to yourself. Let’s begin.


Jeremy Mullins
Bernal-lite

Jeremy Mullins’s art resembles Jeremy Bernal’s art in many ways, mostly in terms of style, shading, coloring, and having the character drip gallons of fluid from their cunt. Unlike Bernal, Mullins actually gives his fictional characters backgrounds and writes stories about them. Also, the "M" in his signature looks like a "B". I’m just saying.


This is so unremarkable it makes me puke


DeviantArt
A community of expression and shit

DeviantArt is a treasure trove of first-grade art filled with goth and furry shit. Users can browse through thousands of art submissions falling under one of the following categories:

Artisan Crafts – This section is mainly comprised of works made from random shit you can find around your house. This section is the most useless fucking thing I have ever seen. Excuse me, I seemed to have mistyped.

Traditional Art – The largest section of DA; this is where users submit their painstakingly drawn crap. Ahem. Most of the work consists of furry shit, goth shit, anime shit, and a mix of the aforementioned subjects. Fucking retards.

Digital Art – For those users that are too lazy to pick up a pencil, you can simply use Photoshop, edit a few images here and there and Voila! You have an eyesore.

Photography – Thanks to digital image capturing, users are now able to post pictures of the scenery, of themselves, and of their family. My family left me. This entire section is populated by ugly, attention-craving whores. I hope their children are born without eyes.

Poetry – Aw, Christ, do I even need to go into this? It’s all emo crap about pain and sadness from pampered little shits who wouldn’t know suffering if it killed their parents. Wait, what happened?

Prose – Stories, basically. Hacks, all of them. Most of the stories revolve around horribly sub-par pulp that gives me a headache to read.

Designs & Interfaces – I have no fucking clue.

Mosaics – If retards could make art, this is what it would look like. Damned keyboard.

Flash – If you want an example of how Flash looks like when it’s used by monkeys, then go here.

DeviantArt no longer allows porn on the site.


SheezyArt
DeviantArt’s retarded brother

SheezyArt is a furry art site which was started when DeviantArt pulled off the porn. SheezyArt is basically like DeviantArt, only a thousand times more retarded. Porn has been disallowed, and isn’t that a fucking shame.


Fur Affinity
Kind of broken

Fur Affinity is another furry art site, which is in a perpetual state of crashing and rebuilding. Most of the time, the server is down or the server is being changed, or someone is shitting all over it. You’d think these idiots would know how to code a damn website, but no. This site kisses so much artist ass it’s appalling.


Furcadia
What the FUCK

Furcadia is a furry role-playing game, where you move an anthropomorphic character around and around and around and around and around and around. You can initially choose a limited number of species: Dogs, cats, mice, horses, and rabbits. You can choose fur color, hair color, eye color, and clothes color. For some reason, they all wear old-fashioned clothing. It’s cool, I guess. If you pay $5.00, you get a customized "fursona," and a portrait and useless shit to boot. You get a "pawtograph book" (yecch) for your friends to sign. Then, when you’re masturbating on a lonely night (read: every night), you can open it up and think of the people who love you for you, you sad, pathetic freak show.

Inexplicably, Furcadia also sells pixels. You heard me: Pixels! Pixels for your fake character to sashay around and around in. Let’s say you want to buy some wings. Wings are like, cool and not mundane, right? So, how much would it cost you to buy these fake wings?

$19.95 per year.

It gets better! Want to keep those wings for two years? $29.95! Want ‘em for life?

$99.95.

And that’s just for the "Classic Wings." Butterfly or bat wings cost $124.95.

You can even buy a dragon "fursona." Cost for life?

$249.95.

It goes on and on. Want to give your character some roses? $5.00 per rose, OR $20.00 for a dozen.

If, for some insane reason, you buy one of these "For Life" rip-offs, you get your character’s name listed on their "Thank You" page, so your fat, useless ass can feel fucking special. I mean, really, you spent $250 dollars for a fake dragon?

The gameplay consists of wandering around until someone interacts with you. And by "interact" I mean "typefuck."

But you get to do more than walk around! You can stand…or…you can sit…OR...you can lie down! RIVETING!

The adult sections of the game consist of going into a "dream" and fucking. That’s all you do. Fuck and suck and fuck, suck, fuck. I have no idea why Furcadia is so popular.


VCL
OhJesusfuckingChrist

Where’s all this boldfaced type coming from? Anyway, when Yerf decided not to allow pornography, there was a big uproar. Furries not allowed to look at porn? That’s like saying a fish isn’t allowed in water. In response to this, VCL, or the Vixen Controlled Library (which is the stupidest name ever) was created. VCL is home to the worst artists to walk upon this forsaken plane of existence. Artists like Urban Hermit. That says a lot. Hundreds of awful and just plain mediocre artists lining up to submit their scribbled pictures of foxes fucking; not only that, you’ve got every conceivable fetish on display here. You’ve got inflation, fatties, rubber, bondage, vore, macro, micro, babyfur, shitting, enormous dicks and breasts, herms, muscles, dicknipples, shitting dicknipples, enormous breasts with shitting dicknipples, pedofur, rape, mutilation, orgies, pregnant furs, paw lovers, plushies, fursuits, tickling, incest, vomiting, bestiality, and much, much more. God help us, there’s much, much more. This site has over 300,000 pictures and stories on it. Let that sink in.


Yerf
Clean furry archive

Yerf is an archive used to display only "clean" furry art. "Clean" furry art? Ha ha. Oh Jesus. Ha ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Ahem.


FChan
Fuck the artists

FChan was established as a wakaba image board to post furry art while still RESPECTIN’ TEH ARTISTS! FChan goes by nine simple rules:

1. Fchan is for anthropomorphic furry art only (the occasional non-furry anthropomorphic image is fine, but don't overdo it). Pretty much anything that's non-furry is allowed on 4chan, and will be deleted. If you persist in posting non-furry material you will be banned.

If you post anything illegal under US or UK law, you will be banned, and your details will be forwarded to the relevant authorities.

NO MUNDANE HYOOMANS ALLOWED! >

2. Everything on Fchan is arranged by board topics:

/f/ - Female: Lesbian or solo female pictures (no males or herms allowed)

A board where you can look at the things with the bumps on their chests and the slit instead of a penis. What are they called again?

/m/ - Male: Gay or solo male pictures (no females or herms allowed)

The second most frequently visited board. This is not surprising, seeing as how 99% of furries are jailhouse gay and love getting it up the pooper.

/h/ - Herm: Pictures featuring dickgirls/herms (unless it's /a/, /ah/, /mem/ or /tent/ material)

I have to question why hermaphrodites are so popular. Is it because they have a penis AND a vagina? Best of both worlds? Or is it because furries are inherently freaky?

/s/ - Straight: Pictures of anything involving both genders (unless it's /a/, /ah/, /mem/ or /tent/ material)

This section is infrequently visited, and isn’t that surprising? It’s just so vanilla!

/tent/ - Tentacle: Pictures of slimy beings having their way with an antro (anything non mammal, featherie, or scalie)

I’m surprised this board doesn’t have more visitors. Usually, the thought of tentacle rape is enough for a furry to grab his dick and start pumping.

/a/ - Alternative: Pictures of anything that wouldn't be considered "normal" furry porn, but is considered acceptable fetish by the majority of the fandom (bondage, bukkake, micro/macro, etc.)

The keyword is "majority."

/mem/ - Memories: Pictures involving fan favorites, or the shows you grew up with (saturday morning cartoons, Disney Afternoon, Sonic the Hedgehog, etc.)

The most frequently visited board, and what a big fucking surprise that is. It’s astounding that furries scream and rant about copyright infringement or whatever and then turn around and post shit like this.

/ah/ - Alt(hard): Pictures of the really hardcore stuff and that which squicks the majority of the fandom (babyfur, bestiality, cub, guro, non-consentual, rape, scat, violence, vore, watersports, etc.)

You know your fandom is fucked up when you need an alternative to the alternative.

There’s more like this: A clean section (yawn), a flash board (for badly made porn animations), a discussion section (vapid, stupid discussion of trite matters and porn), a critique section (the rules say not to flame, but since disagreeing is considered flaming, you’re shit out of luck), and a request board (for porn).

Most of the other rules are boring and unnecessary. All but two have the word "banned" in them. The most noteworthy is Rule #4, which includes the DNP, or Do Not Post list:

4.(a) Fchan believes in respecting the rights of artists who spend many hours creating quality work for you. The Administration attempts to keep an accurate running list of artists who have contacted us requesting that their work not be posted. Please respect their wishes and do not post anything by the following artists:

(Insert really, really fucking long list here.)

(145 entries) -- 2006 / 03 / 1

HOLY FUCK.

145 ARTISTS DO NOT WANT THEIR ART DISTRIBUTED.

But wait! That’s not all!

as well as any pictures from the websites:

(Another list.)

(21 entries) -- 2006 / 02 / 27

Holy shit. 21 websites are off limits. AND THE FUN DOESN’T END THERE!!!!!!!111111111ONEONEONEELEVEN

(b)Art from commercially available sources (CD collections, comics, etc.) and unauthorized edits of pre-existing pictures are off-limits as well.

(c)Art from online sales venues (FurBid-SF, Fur-E-Auction, E-Bay, etc) is considered a commercial source and is not to be posted.

I’m pretty sure totalitarian governments are less restrictive. Maybe.

My personal favorite:

7. Our Admin (Sage Nadia#nIcYyoHO4A) and Mods (Xenofur#XnbYdrqnio, Raven#hRo3gNniV) do this out of their free time for you. Respect them and the decisions they make.

In other words, keep your mouth shut, because moderating a pornography board is, like, hard. It probably is, but please don’t be so bombastic as to say you’re doing this for me. Please.

They do not need to justify anything to anyone out there and should not be expected to waste their time explaining themselves to others.

So they can do anything without explaining themselves to others? Dear God, please don’t give these people real power.

Let’s talk about the moderators:

Raven – Raven has the morally downtrodden job of sucking off Xenofur and Sage Nadia. The low man on the totem pole, Raven can only click the "Ban" button a bunch of times. Poor bastard.

Xenofur – Xenofur is above Raven, but below Sage Nadia. Sage Nadia’s bitchiness has rubbed off on Xenofur, since most of his posts indicate he has a large, cumbersome object in his rectum. In addition to pressing the "Ban" button a lot, he does the coding of the site, debugging, and other stuff like that. He can override Raven’s decisions, and it must hurt to be below a guy with a name like "Xenofur."

Sage Nadia – Sage Nadia is the site’s administrator; she has a hand in all of the above duties, in addition to many more. The big bitch on campus. I cannot fathom this colossal cunt’s attitude, which surpasses my own. Not only is she ban-happy, she has a snide, "I’m better than you" manner, which is rather contemptible. Almost every one her posts include a variation of "My way or the highway," or "I’m the administrator so I can do what I want." She respects any artist to an unnerving degree and acts as if being an admin is some arduous task that only an elite few can undertake. Here’s a hilarious quote from this looney:

"Being a full time artist is more work than even being an intern in an ER. It is harder and more competitive than just about any other work you may find."

Let me get this straight: Being an intern or even a doctor in an ER isn’t as tough as being a fucking artist? I guess being a soldier is a cakewalk too, eh? This quote is now part of my signature, and I can’t believe it’s not on the front page. What the hell?

What’s bizarre is that Nadia and the other mods seem to hate what they do. So why keep doing it? It’s probably some bullshit about providing a service to TEH ARTISTS. Even more inexplicably, posters will frequently pop in to say "That picture is DNP!" or kowtow to the mods in some way. Are you kidding? They don’t care about you. In fact, they hate you.

I just hate FChan because it’s full of sycophants and the moderators are dickweeds. Yes, you should enforce the rules, but that doesn’t mean you should act like a giant vagina while doing it. You can be kind and reasonable. I mean, just look at our own Mitch. [/blowjob]


Let’s finish the article with a few more artists.


Michele Light
SAME. FUCKING. FACE.

Michele Light is an artist that draws "cute" art. "Cute" my ass. This would be fine if her art was exclusive to Yerf, but her subjects are semi-pornographic in nature, meaning it gets posted on Onechan and the like. By "semi-pornographic" I mean they sit there in their underwear. If they’re topless, they have their back to you. Fuck! Light’s love of anime shows in her work FUCK! I’ve HAD it with that anime-style shit! The only fandom that rivals furry in terms of sycophantic, ass-kissing, dick-sucking, brown-nosing fanboys is the anime fandom. I hate the Japanese.

And her expressions are the same! Compare one Light picture with another. What do you get? SAME. FUCKING. FACE.

I’VE HAD IT. WHOEVER IS TYPING SHIT ON THE COMPUTER NEEDS TO STOP. I’M SICK OF IT. THIS IS PRIVATE.


Insert random hate-filled comment here


Manawolf
Ramblin’, ramblin’, ramblin’, RAWHIDE

Manawolf has penned some rather controversial essays on many subjects. I don’t know where to begin. She has a long-winded essay arguing supporting bestiality! To be honest, most of her essays are rambling, boring pieces of pulp I would rather wipe my ass with then read. In one, she argues about the advantages of not shaving. I mean, if you want to walk around like a grizzly bear all day that’s fine, but don’t expect people to go out with you. I mean, if you don’t want to shave your pubic hair, that’s fine. In fact, I prefer that short of thing. As long as it doesn’t look like you have a Wookiee in a leg-lock, I’ll be happy. But when you grow out your armpit and leg hair, you’re asking for some ugly looks. As for the bestiality thing:

Seek help. Professional help.

She prattles on about how the furry fandom isn’t about sex and how spiritual it is and other hollow bullshit. One gets the feeling she’s one of those "flower children" who’s all one with nature and shit.

I’m also getting the sense that we’re not dealing with the sharpest knife in the drawer here. Especially disturbing is this post from Portal of Evil from 2001:

"I think we as a country are unjustly accusing people of being child molesters. If the boy or girl is old enough to understand and consent to sex, they should be allowed to do it, whether they are eight or eighty. I would have no personal problem having sex of anyone regardless of age, species, sex, you name it - just as long as they knew what 'sex' entailed."

Tell me, does it feel odd to have a tenuous grip on reality? It must have its perks. After all, anyone who spends so much time musing over why it’s okay to have sex with animals can certainly find some things – like communicating with aliens – to be quite easy. Seriously, it looks like it’s time to up the medication; when you think that exposing children to sex is okay, then you are truly fucked in the head.

"OK as long as there are two or more understanding partners:
- Sex, homosexual sex, bestiality, group sex, incest, age-play, watersports/scat, BDSM, etc.

Not OK under any circumstances:
- Rape, murder"

So basically, as long as there are consenting partners, it’s okay. What Manawolf fails to realize is that CHILDREN AND ANIMALS CAN’T CONSENT. A child has an immature mind and therefore cannot understand what sex is. They don’t comprehend the emotional involvement it entails because they aren’t developed fully. Animals can’t consent because they probably don’t know what consent is. Anyone who says otherwise is depraved, period.

Of course, Manawolf thinks her viewpoints make her "open-minded":

"I, personally, look forward to the day when Chythar and my other mates have kids who we can teach how to properly be open-minded in this society which seems to be bending more and more to fascism. I hope that one day I myself have a daughter who I can love and nurture. I can show her a world of polygamy, a world of animal Respect. I'm sorry if I will have to teach her about sexuality in private, but I think it would be a wonderful thing to be able to the one who gives her her sexual awakening. Just imagine how wonderful it would be to have children who could mate with your mates, be them human or not."

I really have nothing to add to this. There’s something to be said about an individual who expresses opinion like that, but I am not the one who can say it.

By "nurture," I guess she means "molest."

Not surprisingly, Manawolf draws pictures of the characters from The Secret of NIMH boning each other. It’s a blow to your credibility when you draw something like that.

All in all, Manawolf is a deeply disturbed individual, and I’m sad that someone like her exists in society. I’m also sad she has such a huge following. But hey, this is furry: If you can’t pander to a crazy bitch in favor of incest and zoophilia, you can’t pander to anyone.


Once again, I’m at a loss for words


That’s it for me. I still don’t know who put all this bold crap here. Anyway, good night, and go fuck yourselves.